Miracles DO Still Happen

My Volvo is trying to get me fired.

I know... I know... It sounds a lot like 'the dog ate my homework' or 'aliens abducted my homework notebook.' But here's what happened. What really happened.

Some weeks back, the key fob to the Volvo broke and fell off my keychain. No problem, though. The keys still work, right? So I woke up this morning only to find the drivers door lock frozen tight.

No problem. I'll just use the lock on the passenger side door and hit the unlock button. Worst case scenario -- I have to crawl across. Oh, yeah! Newer Volvos don't have exterior locks on the passenger side door anymore.

PROBLEM!

After a brief moment of panic, rational thought started to creep back into my brain. Why, I'll simply heat up the key. Brilliant! Someone showed me that trick once and it actually worked.

My first thought was the cigarette lighter. However, if I could get to the car lighter, then I probably wouldn't be stuck in my current situation.

Unfortunately, I don't smoke, so there were no lighters to be found. I did find a grill lighter, though. In fact, I found two. Tragically, they both spent they're last dying moments in my fumbling, frozen hands which were trying desperately to hold the flame and key steady.

On my fourth trip into the house, I found a box of matches. As I reached the car, I discovered the box contained only two matches. No problem, I thought.

On my fifth trip into the house, I found a full box of matches. My still frozen fingers, however, were still having problems holding the matches and key steady and close enough before my matches burned out.

I was beginning to be very late for work. Funny how the panic of an encroaching deadline can invoke creative thinking! A candle! That meant one more trip inside.

A pile of wax covered matches and grill lighters and 10 minutes later, I managed to break into the stubborn vehicle. Miracles DO still happen.

I must have been a sight, standing amidst my arsonist pile while holding my lit candle. I imagined my neighbor, who happens to be one of my first-graders, standing at the window and his possible reaction to the sight across the street.

"Mom! Mom," he probably yelled. "Come quick! My teacher is trying to set his car on fire!"