New Technology... Is That an App?

I'm currently fighting a battle. You could call it a battle of good versus evil, but that might be laying it on a little thick. No, it's more like a battle of old school sensibility versus new age thought processes.

Loosely translated -- technology is kicking my butt!

I am the proud, new owner of a previously gently used iPhone. I'm discovering that there are many, many things that this phone is capable of doing. That list also includes many things I don't think I am capable of doing, iPhone or not!

Just when I was getting the hang of my iPod, technology throws me a knuckle sandwich, so to speak. My last blog post was written and posted on this strange device. Notice the change in font and photograph that doesn't seem to be there.

It has a camera on it. I actually have a rudimentary knowledge of how to use the camera and have taken numerous photos. The photos impress me when my wife has a moment to pull them up to show me.

Here is a photograph of my foot. For some reason, those come quick and easy for me! I'll share this one before it gets deleted, like all the others.

This thing even takes video! We haven't ventured into those waters, yet. Patience and time... We're taking this one step at a time.

I thought I had the calculator figured out until I turned my phone sideways. Holy *bleeeep*!! Trig kicked my butt in high school! Is this an app? Lord, tell me it's not so!

I have a stocks function on this iPhone. As of this writing, NASDAQ is -1.61, whatever that means. When I can afford to have my dogs groomed, perhaps I'll invest in stocks. But not the NASDAQ. I'll only invest in things with positive numbers.

Get this... I can even surf the Internet! Except, for me, it's more like getting ploughed over by a tsunami.

I've been informed by a trusted source (my 15 year old) that touch screen technology is not new. It's fun, but you have to be careful what you touch and how you touch it.

I started out in Yahoo! news. I tried to scroll down, but a new page came up. Since I didn't need the hair growth formula, I hit the back button. It seems I have wide, or fat (or whatever!), fingers and a dating site for lonely Asian women came up. Big button. Do over.

My second time around, I started with Google. I was attempting to get a business phone number and address. Let's just say that you also have to watch what you search for. I won't say what came up. I will tell you that typos in the search line can be disastrous.

Computers, Ice Scrapers & Underwear, Oh My!

My Dell Insipid has been given a new lease on life. No offense to Dell, of course, but in my household, when a computer dies for any reaon, it gets renamed. With that being said, just trust me when I say there have been some foul-named computers that have come through my home.

Thank goodness for my personal computer fix-it technician/guru, alias my brother-in-law! I'm nominating him for sainthood, and not just because he breathed life into another one of my plastic boxes filled with wires and chips and is supposed to have electrical pulses race through it to make it operate properly. He has also been installing light fixtures and ceiling fans around my home since I've started working 40 hour days.

Regardless of my suicide work schedule or computer status, I am plugging on and moving forward, sometimes one letter at a time on the trusty iPod. And speaking of status, here is an update post on some of my previous posts about which I have been questioned.

First, I want to apologize to my readers and everyone else. After writing about my problem with ice scrapers, as well as my general lack of scrapers, I received quite an influx of the little devices. This, and the fact that I was looking forward to a cold, frosty winter so I could use the scrapers, seems to have prevented us from having a cold winter. You know, kind of the same way you forget to pack a rain coat and it rains for an entire weekend vacation...

Anyway, regardless of what I've said or written about Bob, our spaniel, he has really grown on me. I won't be giving him away, getting rid of him, sending him down the stream, etc. To everyone I have promised a free dog, forget it!

For those of you who know me and have been in my white car, it's not really going to blow up! All I'll say is, it's amazing what a difference a tire can make.

And a big thank you to all of you who honk and wake me up now in the morning. My new school morning duty has me standing alone out front. Whether friendly or not, the honking and waving has helped keep me awake and paying attention.

And on one last note, thank you to my family. While my missing underwear remains just that, my family came through for me for my recent birthday (happy 44th, crazy man!) and gave me underwear. I'm glad to report that as of this post, I am not doing the wash nearly as frequently.

Another Laptop Shot to &*## !

Today's post has been created and brought to you through my iPod. But please don't be misled. I am NOT embracing the fleeting concept that is known as technology. In essence, I'm utilizing what I can in place of technology that no longer exists for me.

Why did I peck out this post one letter at a time on something so small that it borderlines on the tortuous and ridiculous? The answer lies upon my desk. Literally.

It's my door stop. A door stop sits upon my desk. It's a silver door stop. Nothing fancy. It has a standard QWERTY layout with a flip up 15 inch screen (I'm guessing). It has top mounted speakers and several other features which have all been rendered moot by the death of the screen, or hard drive or both!

My personal computer tech, alias my really awesome brother-in-law, originally told me that it might be the auxiliary battery from which the date and time stamp run off. Now that my Insipid, as I've renamed it, is in computer camp at his house, he said the hard drive crashed. Since I haven't been in any car accidents lately and I haven't dropped my computer, I'll just assume my son crashed the device into the wall or something.

Whatever! Regardless of the reason, my laptop has been rendered a lump of metal, plastic and wires. Like I said, a door stop.

Needless to say, I'm up that proverbial creek without a paddle. If I am lucky, my personal computer tech will be able to fix my "hand me down" laptop. Otherwise, I'll hope someone else will be getting a new computer and will throw their castoff in my direction.

Until then, the posts may be excruciatingly slow in coming since I'll be pecking them out one letter at a time on the iPod. Then I will have to retype them into my blog on a borrowed computer.