Golfing Newbie Shows Potential

I've discovered a sport where you get to drive carts, carry clubs and whack the heck out of little white, dimpled balls over a vast expanse of land that is riddled with little holes. It's called golf.

Incidentally, that is also my newest adjective that I have managed to acquire -- golfer. You can add that adjective to the rather large list of adjectives that currently describe me.

I have been playing long enough, though, to know which end of the club you use to hit the ball. Also, the balls are supposed to be aimed at the little holes scattered randomly around the grounds.

It seems one of the most important rules of the game of golf is that you don't hit just any white, dimpled balls you find laying around. Somehow, you have to be able to differentiate your white, dimpled ball from all the others scattered around the landscape. You can only hit your own white, dimpled ball. This adds a serious degree of difficulty to the game.

The good news, though, is that I am destined to be a great golfer. My reasoning behind this revelation is rock solid.

To the best of my knowledge, all the greatest golfers have a signature move or gesture that sets them apart from the rest of the pack of wannabe greats.

I already have a signature move -- my swing! While it has not yet been compared with, say, Tiger Woods or Andre Agassi, it has attracted a bit of attention from my golf partner and other fellow golfers.

I call my signature swing 'the Mongo' for it's strength and ferocity. My golf partner and friend simply calls it unique. I overheard some golfers playing through one day refer to someone as a "seizure with a stick." I hope whoever they were talking about is okay.

On top of all that, I've been known to hit that little white, dimpled ball nearly 100 yards off the tee with my biggest club. Now that is impressive!

As you can see, my game shows a lot of promise and potential. My partner says I can only go up from here!

I am a little worried, though, since I simply don't know if I will have time to write once I join the pro circuit.